Malachan't
by ThisAccountKillsFascists
Summary: A Steven Universe one-shot, a dark little story about the true nature of Lapis Lazuli. Rated W for WHYYYYY?


**Steven Universe: Malachan't**

With a heavy sigh, Lapis Lazuli, hair looking a mess, rolled onto her back on the couch. Peridot hovered over her, a huge smile on her face, the sight of her angled head moderately annoying the azure Gem.

"Well?" her grating voice questioned, and Lapis gave her a stare that clearly meant not to be messed with.

"NO," was all she said, hard, and cold. Peridot's face slowly drooped into a frown, and then her eyebrows knitted, making the expression of anger. In her experience, Peridots were always overly emotional Gems, and her Peridot was no exception. Her Peridot... The phrase disgusted her, and she rephrased it in her mind. The Peridot.

"Well, if you won't come with me, maybe you'll go for someone else? Steven will be there," Peridot teased, and Lapis gave her a flat look. Bribery was annoying. She tipped her head back and to the side, hanging it over the couch to stare upside-down at the credit sequence of yet another Camp Pining Hearts episode. Would it really be all that bad?

"Who else?" Lapis questioned, and Peridot listed names on her fingers.

"Steven, Connie, Greg, Pearl, Garnet, Amethyst... The whole crew, plus some humans," she replied, and Lapis felt her limbs become more heavy, sluggish. She didn't want to do anything, let alone be near all of those Gems, even if it did mean getting to see Steven. But, she figured, if she didn't get out of the barn some time, she'd go stir crazy. It was already hard enough not to think, unless Peridot was talking, but if she were leaving, it would force Lapis to be alone with her thoughts. On a day like today, this was asking for a terrible time.

"Fine," Lapis finally replied, and Peridot lit up, beaming at her again. She couldn't see the value of smiling, to her it was a simple, petty gesture only serving to falsify anothers emotions, goading them toward a positive outlook on an otherwise meaningless existence. Essentially useless. She tugged herself up and stood, her grace evident as she moved to the balcony.

"Meet you there," she said simply, and water erupted from her back, extending into a pair of wings, which she pumped swiftly downward, shooting into the sky. A little flight might do her some good to clear her head before attempting social interaction. It never truly helped, but it was a comfort to know that only she could really do this unless others shape-shifted into birds. Unless you counted Steven's floating, but even then, he kind of sucked at it. She had a little chuckle to herself as she watched the waves pass below, skirting the coast line, headed for the stupid barf-e-que or whatever Peridot had called it.

Food didn't much matter to her. The only thing that did, right now, was making Steven happy, and after a time, when she finally alighted on the beach, she was greeted with a deep, excited gasp as the boy spotted her.

"Ohmygosh, you came!" Steven exclaimed, running over for a hug. She knelt beside him and hugged back, offering him a sheepish smile.

"Peridot said you'd be here," she explained, and his grin filled her gem with the love it needed. Then, of course, Pearl ruined it.

"Lapis! I never expected to see you here, we thought you were still recovering from Jasper's poofing," she said, and the stare of pure hatred she received let her know she'd probably touched a nerve.

"Oh, uh... I'll just be over here," Pearl said, her long legs carrying her back a few steps before she turned around and stalked off, mumbling about rudeness.

"Lapis, are you okay?" Steven asked, holding her at arm's length as he noted her upset face. She turned it toward him, not much changing even as her eyes fell on her best friend.

"Oh, hey, I got you something," Steven mentioned, and reached into a pocket to produce a small token of his friendship, a hunk of pyrite.

"It's called 'fool's gold', cuz it looks like gold, but it's not. Isn't that neat?" She took the shiny rock, and inspected it, the flat facets reflecting her own face a dozen or so times back at her.

"Thank you, Steven," she mumbled, and her face softened, though it turned from a cold, hard stare, to a look of dejected sadness. Steven's own frown followed.

"Well, I've got to go talk to Connie about our meat situation, wanna come?" he offered her, and she said nothing as she obliged to follow him. The excited boy ran across the sand, panting with his exertion, until he pulled up to the bespectacled female she knew to be Connie. Lapis sighed inwardly. Steven loved Connie to death, and the two could fuse like it was no big deal. She wondered why, then, had it been different for her? Her gaze cast out to the ocean, her memories wandering the only place they could possibly go for the past few days.

Jasper had asked for her back.

Granted, she'd sent the brutish Gem sailing through the sky mere seconds later, had told her exactly why she'd not wanted to become Malachite again, but... Her mind floated to the sincerity of Jasper's words.

"I'm the only one who can handle your kind of power," she had said, and Lapis actually knew that to be true. Anyone else, and she'd have easily taken over their minds, imprisoned them within a fusion. Jasper had actually fought back, stiff resistance, difficult to control. That personality, that strength, Jasper had seemed so... So...

"Lapis!" Steven shouted, and she snapped out of it, casting a glance over her shoulder.

"You're crying," the boy mentioned out of concern, his voice oozing worry. It almost bothered her. Almost. She touched her cheek, and brought the droplet of tears away from her face, watching as it slid down her finger and into the sand.

"I'm sorry, Steven, I can't..." And with that, she flew away again, leaving an upset Steven in the sand, though she knew Connie would comfort him.

She didn't need to go far, just to the top of the huge statue that overlooked the beach, and she sat atop it's head, curled into a ball. As she stared at the fabric of her own dress, she couldn't help but remember.

She remembered the darkness of the ocean, the extreme pressure, the only visible stimulus coming from strange, weird creatures glowing in the blackness. She remembered her struggle, and how horrible she'd been to Jasper, the names she'd called her, the things she'd said... How could she have done that to somebody? Somebody, she thought, that had even tried to give her a second chance? After what she'd done?

When they had been together, Jasper had been prone to everything about Lapis. Currently, on this world, nobody knew her better. The thought frightened her, because Jasper knew everything. Everything about her, about her past.

Jasper had been right to call her a monster.

She didn't bother stopping the tears. She made no sound, and, as a Gem, it didn't harm her eyes anyway. After a time, her dress was soaked, and with the use of her abilities, she cast the wetness aside, splashing a small puddle of her fluids of sadness at her side. She heaved a sigh.

Jasper was still here, in a bubble, waiting. Would it really be so bad? Would her friends not understand? She thought of Garnet, of Ruby and Sapphire and the love they seemed to hold for one another when they were separated. They loved each other so much, that they wanted to stay together forever. But she knew the truth, knew the other side of fusion, knew that Malachite had been something entirely different.

Malachite had been power incarnate.

Why were her old urges coming back to her like this? It wasn't fair, she'd tried so hard to be better, and now, just because of Jasper, she doubted herself.

Her thirst for vengeance was returning.

Filled with a new sense of emotion, she finally stood, clenching her fists, wiping her face dry as she looked out over the sea. She had to see Jasper again.

There was no other way.

Swooping down from the statue, without a word to anyone, she abducted Steven in her arms, absconding with him off into the sky. This earned a few horrified squawks from Pearl, especially when Garnet didn't lift a finger to stop her, just watching her retreat with that all-knowing, stoic gaze. So that was how it would be, then?

She flew over the sea, out far, far away, Steven's confusion and pleas for her to release him falling on deaf ears. It was only when she landed on a small island that she put him down, setting him on the sands of a different beach, surrounded now by a vast ocean.

"Lapis, what gives? Why did you take me out here?" he asked angrily, and she gave him a sad look.

"I'm sorry, Steven... But you're the only one I trust, and the only one I knew would maybe understand."

She had his attention now, but the look he was giving her spoke volumes about his unwillingness to be doing this right now.

"I need to see Jasper again."

Steven's gasp made her wince, he sounded like she'd just insulted his mother to his face.

"What the heck, Lapis?! I thought you were done with that brute!" Maybe she'd been too quick to judge him as trusting, but she lifted her finger in defiance.

"Don't put thoughts in my head!" she shouted back, and slumped to the sand, staring at her feet, her expression of anguish turning Steven's heart back around, his human emotions weak and yielding.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"No, it's okay... I thought so too. I thought that, maybe, just maybe, she was wrong about me. I thought that maybe I didn't want to see her again. But I have to talk to her, Steven. I have to do this." She didn't know why she had to do it, though. Maybe to set her mind straight, and prove once and for all she wasn't a monster? Or maybe... Just maybe... To admit she was...

"I don't think Garnet will be happy about this," Steven noted, and she sighed.

"I don't care what Garnet thinks," Lapis admitted, and turned her head toward him.

"I don't care what any of the others think."

Steven couldn't tell where all this was coming from. This wasn't the Lapis he had come to know over the course of the last few seasons... of his life.

"What if she tries to attack somebody again? What if she tries to hurt you?" he asked, and Lapis rolled her eyes, growing annoyed with his resistance.

"I'm stronger than her," she proclaimed, and then gave Steven a serious stare.

"I can handle it, Steven. I could handle being trapped deep under the ocean with her for months, I held her at bay, I hated her down there, I was horrible! You don't know what I'm capable of..." Her voice trailed off, and Steven's face twisted into worry, this was a bad, real bad situation he'd landed himself in. How could they not have seen this coming?

"You didn't know any better," he tried, and set his hand on her shoulder, but she slapped it away.

"Of course I did!" she shouted, and stood, looming over the small boy, suddenly domineering and commanding and terrifying, all at once. It was overwhelming, and he gasped. But when he took a step back, the air of dread lifted, as she softened her expression again.

"Just do this for me, Steven."

He sighed.

"All right... But you owe me," he stated, and she nodded. He held out his hands, his gem glowing, and a bright pink bubble formed around her body. He touched it, and she evaporated... Leaving him all alone on a single island, out in the middle of nowhere...

When Lapis arrived in the Burning Room, the bubble was still around her. She rammed against it, but it didn't budge. Steven had been getting stronger. She opted to not waste her time, and summoned her wings, leaping straight up and shattering her cage in one, singular, powerful wingbeat. She hovered, and looked around at all the gems which lay here, but the one she was looking for, which had been added rather recently, was easy to find. She took it from it's place, taking the bubble to the floor, her toes gently setting upon the ground as she held Jasper's Gem before her. She could almost see the corruption writhing inside of that gem, but she knew what to do.

She reached her hand into the bubble, and curled it around the angular object, squeezing it tightly.

Her gem glowed, and water poured from it, sliding along her body and across her arm, entering her fist. There was a light glow, then it faded, and she burst the bubble with her other hand, opening her fist to view the gem in her palm. Clear as quartz.

She let it clatter to the floor.

At first, there was nothing, but then, slowly and surely, a light surrounded the gem, and it grew, taller at first, and then wider, larger, the biggest single Gem she'd ever seen in her life. And there she was, Jasper. She fell to her knees as her regeneration finished, gasping at the air as her form settled into place. Lapis stood before her, looking down on her with an expression of cooled ire.

Eventually, Jasper noticed her feet, and looked up.

"You..." she snarled, and Lapis did not react.

"Grah! Your stupid friends did that to me!" she screamed, and again, no reaction.

"Well?! Why did you bring me back?!" Lapis turned around.

"Because you were right," she said in a gentle tone, slightly sad, and the yellow Gem's face turned to surprise.

"What?"

"You were right about me..." Jasper stood up, now dwarfing the delicate blue Gem before her.

"What are you getting at?" she spat, her usual demeanor coming into play. Lapis turned around, looking up at her with tears in her eyes.

"It was all my fault..." Now, Jasper's face contorted into a mix of anger and worry, for she understood what this was all about. She'd seen it all, she'd seen Lapis' memories.

"You were angry," she said, "angry at the others. They did horrible things to you," Jasper said, and took a step forward, her heavy footfall making the blue girl flinch slightly. She offered a large hand out, not waiting for Lapis to take it and instead grasping hers.

"You're here for me, aren't you?" she questioned, and Lapis looked back up.

"You want to use me, don't you?" Jasper asked, and her grin became a scary form of grin, the grin of one who could murder.

"Why?"

Lapis looked to the side, her small hand running gently along that big, powerful palm. It comforted her to feel it again. Somebody so strong, she finally had a match in power.

"I'm not done with what I started," came Lapis' reply, and Jasper frowned then, looking up at all the bubbles above her.

"But you cured me?" she questioned, and Lapis nodded.

"Because I... I want you to stay." Jasper's face had no expression for what she'd just heard. Did she hear that right? could she really mean that? All this time, all that... Drama, and now this? It had been what Jasper had asked for the whole time. All she'd needed was Lapis, that one other person who could match her strength.

Together, they could tear the world asunder.

"But I'm not sure if we should... Continue..."

Jasper remembered what she meant.

"The corruption... That's right. It wasn't the Diamonds, it was you! They were merely trying to stop you from defiling their entire race!" She cackled with booming laughter, then, and Lapis looked up to her with that flat, serious face full of rage.

"They deserve it!" she shouted, and Jasper grinned down at her.

"Just like I did?" she challenged, and Lapis faltered, her sadness returning. So conflicted, always so conflicted, Jasper noticed.

"You want Malachite, so you can destroy the Gems? And what then, what after you get what you want?" The end game was important, after all, she was talking about genocide, if the corruption really did eventually kill the Gem it inhabited.

"And then... We'll have eternity to be us," she said, her offer sounding too good to be true.

"And what of Rose? Will I have my revenge?" Lapis frowned, picturing Steven's smiling face. Would she really be ready to sacrifice her only friend, for the sake of this partnership? She looked back up to Jasper. She had seen what Lapis had done, she had seen why they'd imprisoned her. But more importantly, Lapis herself had seen everything there was to Jasper. She'd seen how she'd filled a longing in her Gem, gave her a purpose, a place again. Jasper, in a way, had come to love her. And in a way, she'd come to love Jasper, she'd given Lapis, for so long, a place to put her anger. She'd taken all of it, she'd stood her ground, she hadn't broken a single promise to her, that together, they were complete.

They were Malachite.

She thought of Steven.

"You'll have all that and more," she said, her eyes darkening with her true nature. Sacrifices had to be made. What was one Gem, one Human, one pathetic little hybrid to stand in the way of her entire revenge? It was a dish best served cold, as the humans claimed, and she wanted to taste that dish.

She rose to her toes, and her other hand, the one not held by Jasper's, extended outward behind her. Jasper grinned wickedly, and gave her a twirl, then leaned her over, her face nearing Lapis' neck. They both felt their Gems heat with the fires of fusion, but this furnace would need more to be aflame. Raising back up, she spun, her footwork precise as a soldier of her caliber should be, the grace with which her Lapis Lazuli moved matching along with pure ease, her eyes closed as Jasper led, swirling her around. She paused, and they posed, legs stretched across one anothers, Lapis' hand held high by Jasper, her other poised out, standing on her toes. Then she was taken around again in a whirl, before Jasper flung her outward, and, fully outstretched, rolled her back in. When those big, strong arms pulled her in, she sunk willingly into them, their bodies coating with light as their Gems merged into one. After a few seconds, their massive form filled the room, and a delightfully evil grin spread across their combined face.

Malachite was back, and she wanted revenge.


End file.
